What a day, but I'm not down

Today I went to work and I was very perky and happy at 7am (everyone knows I'm not a morning person. Well 30 minutes later I was sick as a dog. I was throwing up all day. To top it off my year long project was a not a success, but only it was oh so close, so I will fix it. It turns out that it might be better for me that it wasn't a go. So I guess the good Lord knows what he is doing after all. Not the best day in the world, but I am making it do.

Keep a Positive Attitude

The last year or so I have been working hard to stop cursing and to have a more positive attitude (I can't believe how angry I used to be, and that my friends actually put up with it). Can anyone tell me why you did put up with it? I have also noticed that I didn't have quite the harsh personality with certain individuals and I am also at a loss for why. Do you think it is because I knew them before I was old enough to let my anger out instead of hiding it and bottling it up inside? Or could it have been that they just counterbalanced that part of me, or both? For those who really know me I would love to have some real input. You know how I lay awake at night and contemplate the craziest things! Anyway, I wanted to get on my blog and complain tonight, but in order to transform myself I feel I should be positive. So I made a list of positive thoughts or things to mention today. I am so glad that I finally own my own home! I am also glad that my brother ended up living with me for the time being, even though it was by accident, it has given us the chance to save some money and reconnect, we have always been close, but the business of our lives the last few years had distanced us some. Even though I don't like my present job that much, I am glad that I have a job to go to everyday. I am so tired of being fat(due to a medical condition) but at least my belly is full of great food every night. Finally, I am thankful that I finally got my medical diagnosis this past year that explained quite a few of my health issues, not just being overweight. Try to think positive about all your problems as well. If anyone reads this the night I wrote it, then please send out a special prayer for me. Tomorrow I will either get really good news or really bad news about a project that consumed over a year of my life! Remember-BE GOOD, OR BE GOOD AT IT.

Changes

This year I thought I would be in a totally different place in my life. I wanted a grand and bold life change last year and I spent a lot of time and dreaming to make that change. I was set to move overseas to Amman, Jordan and begin a new life. For several reasons, none being my own will, I did not end up in Jordan. I am bored in life and I don't really enjoy my current job that I took a the last minute after resigning my position in Amman. My life is okay at the moment, but it just isn't what I thought it would be at this point in my journey on the planet. I realized this (again) this morning after reconnecting with a dear old friend and reading her blog. I decided to begin again, I needed a new blog to begin fresh. The old one is literally too dark. My life hasn't always been the best at times and I don't like part of the person that I have become. I need to make some personality, career, and other changes to my life. I feel that some will only be slight alterations, others will be transformations and hopefully in the end I will go through one or more metamorphoses and come out of the chrysalises where and who I want to be! Wish me luck and support me along the way.